bad friend...

[demon chloe]

Sometimes lately I have sat and wondered why I feel like a bad friend. One of my closest friends is no longer around for reasons I am not really all 100 percent aware of... and someone else I consider to be a good friend feels distant.

Today Kahle and I decided to make plans to go to M's for dinner tomorrow night. We were going to take him out.... SUbway probably. Leave at about 3.... get home around 11... not a huge deal. SHe called and asked her mom permission ( mom's out of town and Kahle is 19 ) and well...T wasn't thrilled about it. Not at all. I could tell from eavesdroppping in on the conversation. There was a time ...ooh say from age 13 - 18 that they DUMPED that psycho tempered teen on me. Now, when I could use a friend, nope... im not good enough. Make me sad? Yep somewhat... as right now, more than ever... life is scary, hard, odd, busy and slow at the same time... Would just be nice to spend it w/ a friend...

Makes me reevaluate my skills at friendship.... to be honest... I feel like I suck at it lately. No ifs ands or butts about it....

That is how I feel.

[~*Twi*~]

Im with ya Demon i feel the same way i suck at it... i try so hard and then i fail for some reason i don't know why i fail ,i try to be a good friend to people ...but why do i feel im not trying hard enough? either that or the friends iam choosing don't want the friendship 50/50 i dunno sometimes i wonder if i should be alone......

[Father Dave]

you don't prove that
you're somebody's
friend by standing with
them when things are going
well.
you prove it by standing with them
when nobody else
will.

---------------------------------------------
{as previously posted elsewhere}

i believe, my opinion, there is no such animal as a "bad friend". it cancels the other out.

you can be a friend. or...
a friend who is bad.

but anyone who may be listed or thought of as a "bad friend" was not a friend at all.

but thats just me.

tra laa laa.

dave

[Blazey]

I dont know what to say!Hmmm.. I think freindships that are good ones..real ones..are few and far between. I think sometimes life takes us in different directions but a real freind will find their way back..they are never so far away that they cant be found..a phone call works wonders..an email..just a note in the mail even..but real freinds dont need to be invited to call they just do it!!

If you need me amy..you know where to find me and you also know you never bother me.

Shatz has decided that we dont need to plan calls lol..just do it and its so much more comfortable when you get to that point! My ear is always here for anyone who needs it! I might not be here on the net as often as i used to be..i might not be around as much..but i do know that my phone works and thats a sure fire way to find me!

Your not a bad freind..your life is just changing..maybe your outgrowing some of your current friends? Maybe they were not your real freinds all along..maybe they were using you! So many reasons friendships fail...but the true ones wont..You know teresa and I have been freinds for 30 years..but we rarely talk anymore..life has us both going in different directions..I do know this tho..If i called her right now..it would be as if we had spoken yesterday..now thats real!

Dave i like what you said up there..its somethig to think on..

[EvolutionHasBegun]

i need not say much...those who know me know what i think without asking a thing... [img]wink.gif[/img]

[*Olivia*]

friendship, like people...comes in so many shapes and forms

i don't believe we need to keep all our friends for life....they come into our lives sometimes for a brief moment and burn brightly and commonality is shared and then they or we move on....and it's ok people!!!! i see so many posts of such angst on the boards about 'lost' friends....guess what - they're not lost they moved on!!! and its ok!!!!!!

there are people in my life i know i'll never lose as a friend....excluding my romantic friend (which is a whole different ball game in the area of friendship [img]wink.gif[/img] ) i probably have three people i know will never leave my life or if they do it's just a break until we reconnect....my lifelong friends, my 'chosen sisters'

and there are many who have come into my life, been friends and have moved on or i moved on....and i just wish them well and hope they did the same to me...no clinging, no wanting the past back, no wishing things were different....just letting go and wishing well and being blessed by the shared time

i used to spend a lot of time looking back and over-analysing what had gone on....and someone recently helped me see the value of turning around and looking forward instead...that forward holds more potential than past...and oh boy do i feel better for it!!!

i also find i function better and more happily with a few amazing friends than with lots of sorta friends...but that's just me [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Blazey]

Well said!!! I agree with you about the "few" real friends than alot of sorta freinds.. [img]graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

[Father Dave]

and fiona sez; ( speaking of herself)
i used to spend a lot of time looking back and over-analysing what had gone on....and someone recently helped me see the value of turning around and looking forward instead...that forward holds more potential than past...and oh boy do i feel better for it!!!

[img]graemlins/sure.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/wonder.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/smarty.gif[/img]

<font color="green">turning stumbling blocks into stepping stones....never fogetting lessons but never closing our eyes to the future.</font> [img]graemlins/thinking.gif[/img]

<font color="#dbdbda" size="1">[ August 03, 2005 04:56 PM: Message edited by: Father Dave ]</font>

[Blazey]

Once you deal with the stumbling blocks..you can make them into stepping stonez!

I feel like you have to figure out why your looking back before you can move foreward. Forgivness is a stepping stone..grudges are stumbling blocks..so if there was a wrong or a hurt stumbling you..you fix it then it becomes a way to move foreward.. a stepping stone to the future.. [img]graemlins/kiss.gif[/img]

[Kassy]

Amy....
I simply love you, and i have been thru, guess we all have...what you are speaking of.
It hurts, it makes us wonder why.
What did i do?
What changed?
Everything used to be different.
People DO grow, people grow into different directions,,, but i believe as chele said, and i am paraphrasing "you can not talk to someone for a certain # of years, and when you do reconnect, it is as though nothing ever changed"
Sometimes, the regular path we are use to, suddenly branches/forks off into 2 different directions, and it leaves us wondering "why?"
Amy, i have 2 different sets of friends that, sounds the same as what you are going thru.
I look back, i wonder why etc.........
But as Fi, said, to look FORWARD is what it is about.
You will lose out, getting caught up in the "what did i do, why etc"
Amy, you KNOW you are a good person, a kind heart.....so PLEASE don't question yourself. Just accept that the other people/friends who once were, needed to walk another path , for whatever reason.
I am also going to post the lyrics to a song that means so much to my heart.
I have written a mini "novel" to my parents, based on this song.
The song I think for sure, is about lovers, etc..but if you look behind it, I mean really look behind it.........Maybe you will see what I saw.
It is about someone who knows you so well, and will "see things for you, when you can't see"
And for breathing the air for you, when you can't.
This song is important to me, and i only hope noone says anything bad, as I am here trying to help my friend, Amy...........
The lyrics for my Demon:

It?s hard for me to say the things
I want to say sometimes
There?s no one here but you and me
And that broken old street light
Lock the doors
We?ll leave the world outside
All I?ve got to give to you
Are these five words when i

Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn?t see
For parting my lips
When I couldn?t breathe
Thank you for loving me
Thank you for loving me

I never knew I had a dream
Until that dream was you
When I look into your eyes
The sky?s a different blue
Cross my heart
I wear no disguise
If I tried, you?d make believe
That you believed my lies
Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn?t see
For parting my lips
When I couldn?t breathe
Thank you for loving me

You pick me up when I fall down
You ring the bell before they count me out
If I was drowning you would part the sea
And risk your own life to rescue me
Lock the doors
We?ll leave the world outside
All I?ve got to give to you
Are these five words when i

Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn?t see
You parted my lips
When I couldn?t breathe
Thank you for loving me

When I couldn?t fly
Oh, you gave me wings
You parted my lips
When I couldn?t breathe
Thank you for loving me.

For my Demon....May you realize what a good person you are, and find some peace.
You know how to find me, chloe!
I love ya,
Kassy~*~*~**~

[img]graemlins/heart.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/heart.gif[/img] [img]smile.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/heart.gif[/img]